"Then they came for me - And there was no one left to object."

For years young women (at least, women younger than me) have hesitated to identify themselves as feminists. They have hesitated to be seen as bitchy, as lesbian, as ugly, fat women who couldn't get a man. They have feared that the likes of Rush Limbaugh would call them Feminazis and so they say that, although they think women should get equal pay, they aren't feminists.

They believe that everything has changed since their mothers and grandmothers banded together and fought the good fight. Even while their own lives should be proving to them that it hasn't, they have relaxed because the fight is, thank goodness, over. Well, perhaps they need to read Women Losing Ground by Martha Burk.

The fight is not only not over, it is well on its way to being lost. South Dakota has passed a law outlawing all abortions and when Oglala chief Celia Fire Thunder declared that she would open a clinic on the reservation which the state would have no jurisdiction over, the religious right put pressure on the tribe, which then fired her and has now outlawed abortion on the reservation. Women are still earning less than men. The press still comments on what a female politician wears and how she does her hair. Limbaugh and others of his peer group still subject women they disagree with to the argument from intimidation. The girls' section of the toy store is still overwhelmingly full of dolls who primp and consume and devoid of the interesting toys that boys get to play with. Boys on playgrounds still snap the straps of training bras. Female world leaders are still expected to wear shoes that hurt their feet. The number of women in power, both politically and economically, is shrinking rather than growing. The media concentrates on convincing us that we need to leave the workplace and go home and raise our kids (despite the fact that some of us are single parents and can't).

And what are we doing about it? Why, we're becoming more and more obsessed with being perfect. With being thin and young enough. With getting the sink clean enough. With pleasing the men and children in our lives. With being good girls.

Last year a 63 year old woman I was working with at the time told me that she hated herself because she is so fat. Hated herself! And, she added, that if she ever lost weight she still wouldn't be able to like herself, because she is old! To me, both fat and old, that was a tragedy. What chance is there that a 63 year old woman is going to finally get either thin or young? Which means, for her, what chance is there that she will ever be able to like herself? And, what can she accomplish in the world if all of her energy is expended on hating herself? Is she going to fight for fairer wages when she is busy counting calories and calling laugh lines wrinkles?

What, do you suppose, would happen if we took all that attention that we now spend on hating ourselves and avoiding mirrors and wearing vertical stripes and counting calories and reviewing everything we've eaten so far this week to see if we can "afford" two cashews and breaking out in rebellion and then hating ourselves for eating all of the cashews -- what would happen if we took that pathological self-involved energy and turned it outward? If we stopped weighing ourselves and started weighing the politicians and corporate CEOs and far right demagogues who profit from our unhappiness? If, instead of knowing how many calories in an olive, we knew how much the men in our field were earning? If, instead of worrying about whether the men in the office thought we were pretty enough, we worried about whether they were undercutting our careers? If, instead of voting for people who belonged to our political party, we voted for people who supported our issues?

What would happen if we demanded that our representatives at every level of government voted in our favor? What would have happened if every woman who might one day need an abortion or who had a daughter or sister or friend who might one day need one had contacted her Senator and demanded that he vote against confirming Roberts and Alito? What would happen if every woman with a child or sibling or friend or neighbor in the military contacted her representatives and insisted that they demand that this war be ended as soon as possible?

For all of you who saw A Bug's Life, remember that there were more ants than grasshoppers, and once the ants figured it out, the grasshoppers were no longer able to bully them. It's the same here. There are more women and men who support women than there are people who oppress women. If we band together with all of the other people who are also being oppressed, we are the ants. We have the strength. But, if we allow them to drive those wedges between us and to distract us with body hatred, our daughters are going to wonder how we could have been so close and let it slip away.