Thursday, June 12, 2008

So.

How are things going with Maya's Granny and her eternal recovery? Not well.

She has stopped eating again, and the antidepressant they put her on that was supposed to increase her appetite reacted very similarly to the Paxil and Prozac, though it's in a different family of antidepressants, so it's probably not the same problem, but a new one instead. They took her off of this new antidepressant yesterday, though they're maintaining the Wellbutrin, as that did seem to be helping somewhat.

She isn't doing as much physical therapy as she needs to do to get better. That worries me. A lot.

She hasn't picked up a book or shown any interest in reading anything since February. That worries me even more.

Part of me wants to follow the advice of those who say to take her off of the antidepressants entirely. They don't seem to be helping, and she's not making progress, so what's the point. On the other hand, they take awhile sometimes to work, and she wasn't making progress without them, either. She wasn't getting up and moving, wasn't eating, was already in the beginnings of a decline. So second guessing myself is probably not productive.

I can say wholeheartedly that mom's friend Kate is a godsend. I've never known such a devoted, giving friend. Mom was sick, and planning to move in with my Grandma and Aunt Flo, but wasn't really strong enough to go to them at the time of her discharge, so Kate offered to have her come and stay with her. Mom was there for a week and a half, and then wound up back in the hospital, then the care facility. Kate has been going to visit practically every day, which takes at least 2 hours out of her day. Brings her food to try to tempt her appetite. Talks to doctors and nurses. Goes with her to apppointments. Tries to be encouraging and hopeful, and that's probably the thing she needs the most. I don't know how many friends would be this generous with their time and energy, and hopefully, most of us will not have our friendships tested to this degree. The emotional side of watching mom get worse like this is not at all what Kate signed up for. I swear, if I win the lottery, I'm buying Kate a car. With air conditioning.

So that's the news at this point, at least as much as I feel comfortable telling on a blog that is not my own. I hope that my mom can get up and moving soon, and can regain her perspective on life, because right now, it's a pretty hard time.

13 comments:

Betty said...

I was thinking about her just yesterday, and mentioned to my son that I hadn't seen a blog entry in a long time, it seemed. I'm so sorry she isn't doing well. Here's hoping she will regain her appetite and energy soon.

Linda Atkins said...

I'm so sorry things aren't better, J. I hope MG will get through this and start to improve. Kate sounds remarkable indeed! How lucky you and MG are to have her.

Tabor said...

This is getting to be a long road. I am hoping that all of you get some rest to restore your energy.

Chancy said...

This must be so discouraging for you to go through. Just a few quick thoughts off the top of my head. Would it help if you went up to confer with the doctors and therapists about MG and to get a first hand assesment of the situation? I think that is what I would try and do if I were in your situation.

I am hoping for some real improvement in MG soon.

J at www.jellyjules.com said...

Chancy, that's a good idea, but yeah, I've done it already. Sigh.

Anonymous said...

I've been thinking so much about her. I am really worried that she is not eating. That's so critical for both physical and emotional healing and her mood and energy. I desperately hope they are encouraging her to eat everything she loves, even if she believes it's bad for her.

In all honesty, I feel as you do about perhaps going a few weeks without anti-depressants and sedatives of any type and seeing if that helps.

Please tell her she is thought of with much love and missed very much. Sandy

kenju said...

I think of her often and wonder what is happening. Thanks for updating us, even if the news is not what we'd like to hear. Please tell her I am wishing her the best. (Kate is an angel.)

Deja Pseu said...

I'm so sorry to hear that Maya's Granny is still struggling. Thank goodness she has you, and her friend Kate.

J at www.jellyjules.com said...

Sandy, the food is a difficult issue. She has lost all interest in food...and while once in awhile she will show some interest, it's often for something that will do her no good. For example, the doctor will tell her she can have anything she wants, and she will ask for jello...which has zero in the form of nutrition. The doctor would prefer to give her ice cream, because it has some calcium and protein at least.

So she'll tell us something she might like, we fetch it, and then she doesn't want it.

I've heard this is not uncommon in patients, especially those with depression, but it doesn't make it any easier to watch, since she needs the nutrition to get healthy again.

Barbara said...

So sorry that MG is having such a difficult time. I know how frustrated you must be as I have gone through similar situations with both of my parents. MG is so lucky to have you and Kate! Sending prayers and positive energy.

Peace!

Kay Dennison said...

Thanks for the update, Julie!!!! I have her in my prayers. After a catastrophic illness, depression is common as I well know. I also wish I had some answers to help.

Friends like Kate are a godsend and can make a huge difference.

Anna said...

Worrying for you, not least because there are choices to be made about drugs. The symptoms, plus a mood that is so unlike her personality, really do signal depression. I hope that there may be a breakthrough soon. All best wishes to MG, to you and to that excellent friend.

Joy Des Jardins said...

It sounds like you're in a little bit of a limbo with J right now Julie. I can understand the confusion with her anti-depressants. I'm so sorry J's recovery has hit this roadblock. We're hoping right along with you that she starts to improve again. Kate is just wonderful...bless her beautiful heart. I've been checking this site for updates daily....I'll continue to do so. Stay strong Julie....and keep faith....